Had a few too many drinks last night? Feeling worse for wear this morning? Here are a few reasons why a mum hangover is way worse than a kid free hang over (these all apply to dads too!)
1. You’re out of practice
Hangovers were a regular feature of my student days. I had perfected a finely tuned hangover routine (involving comfy clothes, comfort food and lots of bad TV while snuggled under a duvet). Sharing your hangover with your mates was a bonding experience. Since having three kids my hangover coping skills are completely rusty – a bad head in the morning comes as a total shock.
2. Lie in?
A small person will still wake you up at silly o’clock demanding that you get up. The silver lining of a hangover used to be a lazy sleep filled morning after (or sleeping well into the afternoon if necessary). Not any more. A toddler will come and jump on your head at an ungodly hour and will not relent until you get out of bed.
3. Negotiating who gets a lie in
If you and your other half are both suffering, the bargaining starts. One of you needs to get up with the kiddos which is not fun but play your cards right and you may be able to trade this for a little nap later.
4. Early morning chaos
If you do get to have a lie in will consists of spending 30 extra minutes in bed while the sounds of chaos are barely muffled by the closed bedroom door. You will not get back to sleep and you will not find this very relaxing.
5. A greasy fry up
All you want is a fry up but it is probably frowned onto take young children for a nasty greasy spoon cafe for breakfast. You might just be able to pull off a cheeky MCDonnalds Egg McMuffin (a drive through will help you avoid any judging glances).
6. Entertaining the kids
Things that small kids love, like kids TV or soft play, are torturous with a hangover. You will try and persuade your kiddos to watch something calm and quiet like Waybaloo but they will insist something extra loud and obnoxious like Justin Time, they will insist that you join in with the singing and dancing. If you do not co-operate they will jump on you.
Going to soft play when hung over is painful, it’s bright, it’s loud and at some point you will need to dive into a ball pit to rescue your toddler who is being trampled by older children. You try to stay in the calm of the cafe area but the coffee is terrible and other parents are judging you (especially if you still smell of alcohol!)
Good luck any parents out there nursing a hangover! At least you had a great night out!